To You My Love :: Guh Daeehgae Neh Sarang
by Siye
Summary: Based on The Ragnarok Manhwa: A tale of Loki and Fenris.
1. Disbelief

To You... My Love. Guh Daeehgae... Neh Sarang. 

::-:: 

"You may conquer with the sword, but you are conquered by a kiss." -Daniel Heinsius

::-::

Her azure eyes. They quivered as tears threatened to escape. What she had witnessed could only deepen the scarred wound within her heart. Life had come to a standstill, locked on the display bestowed before her.

"Kiss me," whispered the cleric girl, eyes bashfully closed and cheeks hued a rose pink.

The rune knight held her in his arms and hesitantly complied. The two lovers had shared a seemingly secret kiss, hidden amongst the trees. Fenris had seen what she had never intended to witness. The truth she had never knew... no, never willing accepted, bore down as the harsh reality she had failed to see. It was obvious that both Chaos and Iris shared an affectionate bond. From her playful gestures to his carefree acceptance, the two would never be far apart. However, did their emotions equal that of love? Was it due to her foolishness that she could not realize the clarity of it all?

The warlock hastily wiped the few tears that had been shed. She could not be seen, all that she knew must be kept quiet for it was personal and private. The situation had nothing that was of her concern. Any feelings she had before and any previous intents must be done away with, forgotten. She had been too late, and the fates had brought them to this moment. She could not change anything, nor did she want to hurt anyone. She swiftly turned away and proceeded to leave...

"Fenris, why are you here?" inquired a hushed voice.

Too startled to speak, she tried to gaze towards the direction from which it was spoken. A dark figure silently stepped from the shadows, invisible just seconds before.

"Loki... I.. I was just..." she could only stutter these few words.

"Where are the others?" he drew closer, steadily towards her.

"I don't know," she lied.

The guilt was almost too much to bear and shame forced her to look down, she could not meet the gaze of his piercing eyes. Eyes that seemed to look past all lies.

"Is everything alright?" further implored the assassin, taking a few more cautious steps.

She did not have the courage to face him. She could not explain what she had just painfully witnessed.

"I'm very sorry... Please. I must leave," voicing her weak plea and without anymore delay, she nearly ran past him.

The image was unmistakable, something had deeply troubled Fenris. Loki could only stare as the girl fled...

"Fenris..."

::-::

Author's Notes: This will be a short story, but I decided to split it into very short sections. I apologize if this is not to your liking. --;; However, I promise it will be finished very soon and updated ASAP. Also, the setting of this story is further along than the current series volume 11. I thought it might have been obvious, but perhaps not. :)  
  
Please enjoy More is soon to come. - Siye 


	2. Realization

::-::  
  
Loki knew why Fenris had run off. He had seen everything amongst the shadows, and had been well aware of the current circumstances. The blooming relationship between Chaos and Iris had wounded her, and their kiss was the final blow to crush any hopes she had of her one-sided love.  
  
_One sided love..._  
  
Emotions swirled underneath his calm and cool composure. His cold and expressionless outer mask concealed his truth as he silently walked through the forest.  
  
_One sided love...?_  
  
Loki's pace quickened as he covered more ground. He wanted to hear himself think, but the forest was almost suffocating. The rich, draping boughs of the trees... the smell of the moist earth... it was almost too much. He gave a sigh and sat down under the trunk of an enormous tree. He stared into the darkness...  
  
_Why... Why does she love someone... who does not return her love? Why must she endure such pain and sorrow? Why..._  
  
Another thought suddenly seared through his mind.  
  
_Why do I feel the same for her?_  
  
The abruptness of his self reflection alarmed the assassin. He had never admitted even to himself, the feelings he harboured for Fenris. When he had seen her shocked from her encounter and the desolate look of her eyes, of course it had hurt him to see her in such distress; however... was it not some heightened sense of pity? Was it... in truth love?  
  
He had hidden his utmost secret emotions and in realization, it almost angered him. He had not only seen Fenris' misery... but had done nothing to ease it. She knew nothing of his true feelings. Nothing at all.  
  
Loki glanced up at the sky and a full orb-like moon added a soft glow to the dense quiet of the forest. It was becoming late now, and he knew the others would needlessly worry. Fenris would worry.

He stood up and without any hesitation knew what he needed to do.  
  
_Love... There is no question. This is how I feel about you, Fenris._  
  
One question still remained, dully thudding at the back of his mind. Yet, he started to walk back and decided to find the others quickly. The town was fairly close by and they had agreed to spend the night there.  
  
_Fenris... Do you feel the same way? Will you return mine?_  
  
The echo seemed as endless as the night sky.  
  
::-::  
  
Author's Notes: I just noticed that most people who are reading my story will be going, "huh?" after reading my title. Well, I will offer an explanation. Guh Daeehgae... Neh Sarang is quite simply, just a Korean translation of To you... My Love. --;; I hope Loki is too not OOC. But, he's so mysterious... why not eh?   
  
Until next time! :D 


	3. Confusion

::-::  
  
The town was one of sleepy atmosphere and the street lights glowed dimly. The sun had set and any signs of the day's bustling work were gone. Many residents were closing up shops or finishing their errands to return home. A place of dreams, and of peaceful repose.  
  
Chaos and the others were patiently waiting outside the inn, but it seemed as though Loki would be fairly late. Iris gave a listless yawn to break the silence.  
  
"I think we should wait for Loki inside," suggested Chaos. "We could check into our rooms too."  
  
Iris gleefully nodded with a delighted grin; however Fenris was still distant since the incident. She felt like a stranger.  
  
_They act as though nothing happened, like everything is normal and everyone is happy..._  
  
Fenris glanced up quickly to see the couple expecting an answer from her.  
  
_I must not appear too sullen or the others may suspect something. But..._  
  
"Will Loki not mind? We said we would wait here..." Fenris demurred.  
  
"No of course not. It's getting cold and he wouldn't want us to freeze," replied Chaos with a smirk.  
  
Fenris gave a slight smile and curtly nodded.  
  
"Alright then! Let's wait inside the inn," Chaos opened the door and followed after the girls.  
  
::-::  
  
Iris heavily plopped down on her bed and stretched out her arms.  
  
"Finally a soft bed! I feel so tired," she exclaimed as she snuggled into a pillow.  
  
Yet, just seconds later her eyes lit up and she was sporting a mischievous grin on her face. She looked over to the warlock and noticed her to be appearing melancholy.  
  
"Fenris.... You look kinda sad... I know what will cheer you up!!" Iris looked at her with a very sly and cunning expression.  
  
"You know... Let's sneak over to the Boys room and.... Scare them!!!" she gave a snicker before continuing.

"Chaos won't be able to sleep... and I might even be able to see him without any pants!" Iris could not hold the laughter bursting at her sides.  
  
_She really is like a child... so carefree and mischievous..._  
  
Fenris couldn't help giving a modest smile.  
  
_I can understand why he holds a place in his heart for her...and yet..._  
  
"Iris... have you ever... loved someone?" she hesitantly inquired the cleric.  
  
Iris blinked a couple of times before blushing deep crimson.  
  
"You don't have to answer... I was just wondering..." Fenris rushed in to prevent embarrassment.  
  
"No..." Iris looked away and she gazed off solemnly.  
  
"I do love someone. He's very special to me and I miss him when I can't be near him.... _Chaos... _But when we are together, I get all warm and fuzzy inside. It's such a wonderful feeling," she replied with a dreamy look on her face.  
  
"I see.... That's what it's like... It really must be special."  
  
_So special... it hurts...  
_  
Iris looked up with her brows furrowed in confusion.  
  
"Fenris, you've never loved anyone?" she asked curiously.  
  
The warlock tried to mask her emotions, but she could only look away and in silence, she grasped her left arm.  
  
Iris gave a nervous laugh, trying to ease the awkward situation.  
  
"You look really tired... I think you should have some rest Fenris," she gave a weak smile.  
  
"I don't want to bother you. I'll be over at the Boys room. Call me if you need me.. okay?" she quietly left after saying good night in her usual cheery voice.  
  
As Fenris sat down on her bed, she leaned back and closed her eyes.  
  
_I feel so hopeless and lonely... Am I... a hateful person...? Please forgive me..._  
  
::-::  
  
Author's Notes: Well... it looks as though I'll have the story wrapped up in two more sections. The story is coming off a bit more depressing than I had hoped... but we'll see how it turns out. In addition to this, the next section takes place simultaneously with this one. I'll note it again in the next chapter, but I wanted to state it here as well. :p  
  
Do you like how it's coming so far?  
  
Happy Reading! - Siye


	4. Assurance

Part IV is simultaneous with Part III  
  
::-::  
  
The door of the room closed with a muted thud.  
  
"Whoa.... Loki you startled me. About time you arrived," Chaos said with a grin. "Can't you see I'm busy here?" the knight had been carefully polishing his Tyrfing blade.  
  
Loki remained silent, only to remove some of his restricting bone armour. He faced the window, hardly even recognizing Chao's presence.  
  
"My... more silent than usual aren't we?" Chaos poked with a chuckle, "Look's like something's on your mind."  
  
"It's nothing..." replied the assassin tersely. He started to pace the room, clearly showing agitation.  
  
"Well it's obvious you are. Usually you're all stoic and... you know..." his expression changed to utter seriousness. "But now you're so tense. Something's up. I know it is."  
  
Loki glared in his direction, "It's none of your concern."  
  
"Oh..?" a smirk again replaced his face. "Well if you don't want my help then... I guess that's that..." Chaos trailed off.  
  
"It's not anything that you would expect," Loki carefully asserted.  
  
"Expect what? Are we threatened by some evil force? Freya's annoying minions... again?" his expression hinted mockery.  
  
"No," the assassin stated flatly.  
  
"Well... then what? Shoot," The knight adorned a slightly amused expression.  
  
"It's... about..." Loki walked up to the knight, "...Fenris."  
  
The joking atmosphere dissipated, only to be replaced with a look of bemusement on the knight's face.  
  
"Uh... Fenris? What about her? You lost me."  
  
Loki only pressed further.  
  
"Did you know how she felt about you? Or were you oblivious all this time?" his eyes searched for an answer from the other man.  
  
Chaos put aside his sword and his expression altered into a rare face, serious and completely absent of his usual boyishness.

"When we first met, and this stranger had suddenly been overjoyed to see me, I thought the things she said, the things she claimed, were odd to say the least. But even then, I knew her feelings were genuine." He squarely looked up at Loki.  
  
"But... as time passed, I knew I couldn't return them. I.. I cared for someone else. And she was searching for something I could never give her," a sigh escaped his lips. "I should have told her... but..." Chaos again trailed off.  
  
"But... you didn't have the heart to?" Loki finished his sentence. "That perhaps... you even hurt her?"  
  
Chaos looked up in surprise.  
  
"Why are you the one asking all of this? It's strange to hear this coming from you," he implored with a furrowed brow. The curiosity and suspicion was slowly creeping back.  
  
Loki sharply looked away, trying to avoid any eye contact.  
  
"I said it was nothing farm boy. She has just been appearing detached and very quiet. I suspected things were amiss," his speech quickened in defense.  
  
However, Chaos had already caught on and a large grin spread across his face.  
  
"Well... well now..." his grin widened even more with a chuckle, "Fenris is a nice girl, and I'm really glad that you.."  
  
"That I what...?" Loki's darkened tone and his irritated glance instantly silenced Chaos.  
  
With an embarrassed laugh, he awkwardly scratched his head. Chaos looked almost fearful to continue their conversation. Loki turned around and started walking towards the door.  
  
"Where are you going?" Chaos curiously implored.  
  
"It's none of your business," he stated distinctly.  
  
"If it was none of my business... Why did we just have the longest conversation... ever?" he asked. A wily smirk started to form. "You're such a..."  
  
A dagger flew passed the knight's head, just grazing his ear and nicking a few of his vermillion coloured hairs. Before the stunned knight could even utter a single word, the assassin was gone.  
  
::-::  
  
Author's notes: Urgh.. This was definitely the hardest section to write and I'm not very happy as to how it turned out. Some parts seem awkward.. And the discussion between the two was just...... --  
  
Now I fear I won't be able to pull off the ending.. it seemed alright in my mind.. But now.. I really don't know. - -  
  
Heading towards the final part, I hope I won't disappoint. - Siye 


	5. Answer

::-::  
  
Fenris was gazing up at the countless number of stars in the velvet black sky.  
  
They're so beautiful... The stars will continue to shine... forever...  
  
A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts and she walked over to answer the door.  
  
_Strange... Iris is already back?_  
  
The warlock carefully opened the door, only to find a very unexpected person standing there.  
  
"Loki...?" She blinked a couple of times.  
  
"I'm sorry for disturbing you so late Fenris, "Loki said apologetically.  
  
_Why is he here? Wait... is it because of what happened earlier today?_  
  
"No no.. it's fine. I wasn't sleeping or anything. Please come in," Fenris invited him in with a courteous smile.  
  
"Where is Iris? I don't see her in here," he inquired.  
  
"She left for your room only a few minutes ago. Here, let's sit down. Can I help you with anything?" she considerately offered.  
  
Loki appeared to have something urgent that he wanted to voice. As they sat across from one another he started to speak.  
  
"I... I wanted to speak with you about today. I know something is bothering you, deeply, and I want to help you," his eyes softened from the intense aquamarine tint.  
  
Fenris looked down and tightened her clasped hands.  
  
_I knew it... How can I... I can't tell him... but why does... he... why does he want to help me?  
_  
"I know... I know what happened, I know what you saw, and I know... how you feel.... I won't lie to you Fenris," he admitted with concern.  
  
Fenris looked up in alarmed shock. Only, the expression on Loki's face was one she had never seen before. It held the look of utmost care and concern. Almost as if...  
  
After a single second, she had to look away. His startling gaze was too much, too unexpected. With a slight waver in her voice, she began her story.  
  
"I... felt so happy when I had finally found Chaos. It was as if the endless dream of searching had ultimately come to an end. He had awakened me and I felt nothing could come between the two of us, even though we were strangers. Time... Time was all we needed," the warlock again looked up for a just an instant, and her eyes held a nostalgic reminisce.  
  
"However... time itself was against me. I had been too late, and a girl was a part of his life, a wonderful girl, and although the two would bicker sometimes, they were both special to one another and held places in each other's hearts that no one else could fill, "she hesitated before continuing.

"I... in my foolishness.. No, in my selfishness, failed to see that," Her hands balled into fists before her lap, "I.... never wanted to believe what was so clearly revealed before my very eyes,"  
  
Loki placed his hand overtop of her fists and gently held them. A single, glistening tear escaped, and fell on his hand.  
  
"I... think that if I can just be near him, even if another woman is by his side... I will be grateful.... "Fenris bit down her lip, "I want him to be happy.... If I can just be here... should he ever need to me... I'll be here waiting for him," the words only barely escaped her lips as she struggled not to cry.  
  
Loki kneeled before Fenris and tightened his hand around hers. He hated to see her like this. She was too kind and gentle, and thus would only suffer.  
  
"Fenris... I know I'm merely an assassin, a dark soul who has bloodied the hands by killing both: who deserve death, and those who do not," A subdued flash of pain mirrored within eyes.  
  
"I pale in comparison to Chaos, I'm neither honorable, nor have I lived a life of righteousness. However..." he raised his other hand and delicately moved aside the silken hair that covered her eyes.  
  
"I don't want to see you suffer. You deserve to be held and treasured, by any man lucky enough to love you... and to have his love returned," he whispered, searching for an answer within her tear filled, beautiful azure eyes.  
  
The girl was at a loss for words and a faint crimson tinge, flushed her white cheeks.  
  
"I love you Fenris Fenrir... However undeserving of your love I may be," he boldly proclaimed, and he moved his hand towards her lower lip and tenderly caressed it with his thumb.  
  
Fenris could only gaze into his calm, aqua eyes. The answer was there.  
  
Lost within her eyes, Loki embraced the girl in a soft and gentle kiss.  
  
_To you... My love._  
  
::-::  
  
Author's Final Comments: I would like to thank everyone who took the time to read, "To You... My Love." I'm humbled that anyone would even want to read my works in the first place. I hope everyone will enjoy how it ended, and will forgive me for any mistakes that could have been prevented, (i.e. poor grammar, out of character portrayal, etc). I only wish for you, as the reader, to have enjoyed reading this fanfiction story, as I have enjoyed writing it.  
  
Thank you very much for your support. :) - Siye


End file.
